PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Randomize
