Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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