I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
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