I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize