Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
