So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
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