Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
