How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Randomize
