I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
i came on her dog
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize
