I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
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