I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Randomize
