I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
Randomize
