So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Randomize
