I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
