that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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