is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
just found out that she named her cat after me.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Randomize
