shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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