did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
Randomize
