Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Randomize
