You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
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