Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
