Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Randomize
