We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
