Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Randomize
