The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
NoShamevember. You game?
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize