Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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