he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Randomize
