Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
