i think i have herpe
just one?
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Randomize
