Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
he's single and there are thong briefs.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
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