As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
