i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Randomize