singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
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