smell my finger.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Randomize
