I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
