the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
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