remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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