i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
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