i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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