U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
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