Having a random hookup so left but love u
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Blow job season was short but glorious.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
