Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
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