She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
