thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
