it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
My underwear smells like fireworks.
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
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