brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize
