she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
