I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
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