Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
You are the jesus of drinking
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
