is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
