he shaved USA in his pubs
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Randomize
